Well, Apple Keynote Bingo was fun

Update: Final scores on the doors: I came achingly close to completing not one, but two lines, and yet Apple ruined my chances by not expressing something was the biggest change in recent memory, or wheeling out another free U2 album.apple_keynote_bingo_player_8_0

The only small consolation I can take from this failure is that, yes, I really was playing this on my own while colleagues slaved over liveblogs. I have no shame, but alas I also have no winning line. Next time. Next time.

There’s a bingo hall near my house. I’ve never been in, but clearly enough people enjoy bingo for it to stay open. Perhaps you were planning on hitting the bingo hall tonight, but say you’re torn: you love bingo, but you also love Apple keynotes. If that bafflingly unlikely scenario applies to you, I’ve got you covered. Here comes Apple Keynote Bingo!

Get a line of Apple clichés in a row, and you win an imaginary prize. It’s as simple (and pointless) as that, unless I’m missing some subtleties of the game. As I say: I’ve never been in. Alongside the usual Apple tropes, look out for topical gags about Pokémon Go, exploding batteries and the FBI.apple_keynote_bingo_player_8_0

The gallery has nine different versions of the grid should you actually take me seriously and want to play along at home. Alternatively, if you’re not working the event like the Alphr team is, feel free to make it into a drinking game. It might make the more dull parts go that bit faster.

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This is how you watch the iPhone 7 keynote, and keep an eye on Alphr for live updates as the evening progresses. See you at 6pm GMT.[gallery:0]

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